Is Flattery Appropriate in Sales?

When flattering a sales prospect, honesty is your friend.

by Brock Henderson Principal, Henderson & Associates [January 3, 2008]

A while back, I was asked how I felt about salespeople using flattery, and the basic answer is quite simple. Sincere flattery is always appreciated. Insincere flattery is the mark of an unprofessional suck-up and should be avoided.

Everyone likes to receive a compliment. When you get a positive comment about your company or one of your staff, don't you appreciate it? Sure you do. And your sales prospects will too.

If you are talking with a business owner and offer a sincere compliment about his business he will appreciate it. Actually, I've caught quite a few business owners off guard when I've made a positive observation about their business. First they are surprised you even noticed, and second they are proud that it was noticed.

Sincereity and the truth
Now let's discuss for a minute the difference between an insincere compliment and a sincere compliment. It is entirely possible for an honest compliment to come across as insincere because of the way it was said or even the subject matter of the compliment.

When you enter a prospect's business for the first time you could say "Nice office you got here." Wow, that's about as impressive as a wet handshake, and sounds phony. Rather, identify something special about the office; if there are lots of plants in the lobby, then a comment like "I really liked all the plants in the lobby, it gives a very professional, yet comfortable feeling when you enter" sounds sincere.

I have met individual businessmen who had very attractive and distinctive ties. I could say, "Nice tie", but frankly that would sound insincere. Instead, I normally say something like, "I really like your tie, where did you get it?" which is much more endearing and more likely to generate a positive feeling in the prospect.

Good compliments will make the recipient feel good about themselves, and ultimately good about you. Mundane compliments and insincere compliments will do nothing to raise the self-esteem of the recipient, and will do more harm than good to your sales efforts.

You cannot—and probably should not—attempt to compliment the client every time you meet; however, you can remind them of the compliment. For the executive with the nice tie, consider saying, "I see you're wearing that tie I admire so much".

For the executive with the nice/comfortable offices, "It's always such a pleasure to come here."

Spending your time is a compliment, too
There is another type of compliment too: simply saying, "I'm interested in your business." When I started my own business, one of my prospects was a small record store that I was trying to sell some advertising to. Every time I came in he would tell me that he didn't have any money, which I knew was an excuse to get rid of me.

One day I came in while the owner was working on a window display, and he immediately came out with his "no money" line. I responded, "I know, I just dropped in to see how you were doing." Then, I got him talking about himself, his business, and anything but me. After about thirty minutes I told him I'd let him get back to work, (not that I had stopped him at all), and left.

A week or so later when I dropped by again he was much more relaxed and communicative. A short time later I sold him, and he went on to be one of my best clients—and a friend.

My compliment? A genuine interest in him and his business. My attitude and questions in those thirty or so minutes demonstrated volumes to him, and it endeared me in a way that is hard to explain. My interest was real, and he knew it, and took it as the compliment it was meant to be.

So by all means give your customers and prospects compliments, but be sure they are sincere, genuine, and come from your heart. Anything less will come across as phony and self-serving.

—End